Too young looking??

Okay I have a BIG problem! I REALLY NEED ADVICE!!


Please help!





There's this guy that I met online through Myspace 3 months ago. We immediately hit it off and within a week of talking online, we talked on the phone EVERY SINGLE night afterwards. I started talking to him online in late October. We both thought each other was attractive %26amp; over these past 3 months we have had this huge emotional bond form %26amp; one day he accidentally said he loved me %26amp; told me to call him crazy but he wasn't going to deny his feelings. (I too said it back a few weeks afterwards because I thought I really did %26amp; he was such an amazing guy)


So things have progressed within those 3 months and we both make the decision that we want to be with each other. He told me he's never felt this way with any other girl he's ever been with %26amp; that he thinks we have something extremely special. So...here's where it gets really hard...This past Saturday (Jan 26th) we met for the first time. We both had the mindset that we would meet, everything would be perfect %26amp; it would be the start of a longterm relationship.


He comes to my door with a huge smile on his face %26amp; gives me flowers. I gave him a hug %26amp; said thank you. We were just making small talk %26amp; he didn't seem very uncomfortable. So, We went out to Chili's %26amp; to see Cloverfield. As the night went on, I could tell that he was just very uncomfortable. He didn't touch me at all, he was pretty quiet, he avoided eye contact. So I'm thinking what the hell? I thought we were going to hit it off perfectly. We came home, I gave him a hug when he left %26amp; said thanks %26amp; bye. Sunday rolls around %26amp; I can tell he's acting funny when I talk to him on the phone. He's really quiet, really distant %26amp; when I asked when he was gonna see me again, he agreed to any date I was planning for this week, but he wasn't making the plans %26amp; didn't sound too excited . At that moment, my gut starts kicking in and it's telling me something is seriously wrong. Monday afternoon I'm talking to him on the phone %26amp; I just wanted some answers so I pressured him to tell me what was wrong. After an hour he finally tell me. Are you ready for this one!?


...He tells me that he thinks I look very young for my age (20) %26amp; he doesn't feel comfortable at all. He can't get himself to be sexually attracted to me. He's physically attracted to me as in he thinks I'm pretty, but he said because of how young I look (he thinks I look 15-17) that he can't find himself wanting sexual desires. He's 27, so he thinks since I look 10+ years younger that he is just doing something extremely wrong %26amp; he doesn't know if he can get used to that. I go over his house Monday night to try to work this out %26amp; the whole time I'm over there he was just extremely uncomfortable to have me there. He's fidgeting, not making eye contact, doesn't want to touch me, standing while I'm sitting. So I started crying my eyes out because I really thought he was going to be the one who would work out for me %26amp; I'm being judged because I look young. I cry for like 5 minutes %26amp; then he starts crying too because he said he doesn't know what's going on in his head %26amp; he thinks he's crazy. He starts hugging me, but I could tell it was weirding him out. He tells me really wants to be with me because he loves me, but he wants to find me sexually attractive too. I told him I'd stand with him if he could try to get over his problem. He tells me he doesn't want me to because he refuses to drag me down with him %26amp; break my heart any more than he already has. He calls me yesterday %26amp; avoids that subject. Now, I don't want to get strung along so I just bluntly asked what's going on with us? Again we talk about the same thing we did Monday night %26amp; he is very confused on what to do. He tells me he needs some time to figure himself out %26amp; if he feels deserving of me, he'll call me. Which I can totally give him %26amp; understand. But what do I do in the meantime? I don't want to keep my hopes up %26amp; get hurt again, but I don't want to give up on him either. So, I'm heartbroken %26amp; confused. So women...what would you do? and men, have you ever had this problem, do you think he's telling me the truth %26amp; for God's sake, tell me what he's thinking please!!!


Thanks to all who answer.

Too young looking??
As I guy I'll tell you you should lose this guy. You may have feelings for him but wait to find the perfect guy for you. If there's something about you, be it physical or otherwise, that he is having a hard time with he's not worth your time, your not right for him he's not right for you. it sucks but you should find someone who likes you for you (I know that's cliché but its oh so true).





another possible thing... I know you dont want to hear it but your girl #2. he's talked to you on myspace and on the phone but you've only met once, IDK the guy from Adam, and I doubt very seriously you'll be able to tell. But hiding phone calls and a myspace friend are pretty easy to do. So if he was looking for some fun on the side and he felt guilty about it when you finally met or he actually wasn't attracted to you then it could be your the girl on the side. Guys suck but it happens a lot.





Either way (#2 is just a shot in the dark.) your worth more than he's willing or able to give. Cut your losses and find a guy worth you.
Reply:I know it sounds strange, but some guys just NEED their g/f to have big breasts, it's for them a sign maturity, it's reassuring, etc. If the woman they're with does not, they have the feeling to date an underage girl... :-(
Reply:Hi,





I think you should just move on. I have the same problem as you but more frequently. Im 26 living in nyc but i look like im like 18. If i try to talk to someone around my age they quick to say im too young........ Sorry i was getting carried away with my probs... It's sad to say just move on.. But neva giv up!!!!!!
Reply:Give him some time, but not too much. If he's not sexually attracted to you (regardless of whatever BS reason he came up with) then it's not going to be anything more than a friendship, though that may also be doomed at this point.





Hopefully he'll come around but I'd prepare myself for the worst.
Reply:i think ya boi needs help. i understand where hes coming from with the underage look he doesnt want to look like a petifile but my advice would be move on...myspace relationships are not destined to work...u want a real world relationship?meet some one in person first that way there is no surprize at the way you look because he has already seen you.
Reply:wow!!! that is so long i cant read it all sorry LOLOL
Reply:Um, is this the start of a novel you're writing? Seriously, we don't need EVERY detail.





I didn't finish reading your question, but my advice after reading part of it is - move on. It's not like you even have that much invested in this relationship. Get over it and find someone new. If he's not sexually attracted to you, crying is not going to help, and there's not anything you can do about it.
Reply:If he doesnt want you, check me out